Waking up early to work out, and other fantasies

^^ My favorite stock photos are the ones of perfectly groomed, coiffed, non-sweaty women smiling demurely while hefting a 20-pound dumbbell or running a marathon. I can confirm that I have never once smiled (or looked that awesome) while trying to curl a 20-pound dumbbell.

I generally think of myself as a go-getter. I love new opportunities, I love learning new perspectives, I love trying new things. I love the feeling of real productivity (although I write this as a lab report sits in desperate need of attention) and a finished product in my hands, as well as the satisfaction of having done my best at a task.

One area where I consistently fall short, however, is making it to the dang gym.

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE working out. Love it. Nothing beats that endorphin rush, the pride in lifting more weight than I did last session, that feeling of slamming the battle ropes into the floor while metal blasts in my ears. It’s awesome and I love it.

And yet, despite my best intentions, I can never seem to get my arse out of bed before everything else in my day gets rolling. I sleep in during those precious gym hours, then -oops! – it’s time to get ready for class, or hold office hours for work, and… boom. That morning gym session is suddenly pushed back till the evening when every Tom, Dick, and Harry decides that they, too, want to PR on a back squat.

It’s especially strange, considering than 1 in 3 women apparently have a circadian clock than runs on a cycle of less than 24-hours, indicating a pretty significant asynchrony that might result from both late nights and early mornings (not to mention early-waking insomnia, which every woman in my family seems to have). Since I don’t have to get up super early for work or class (at least not this semester), and since I’m pretty young, I’m not in the habit of getting up early – and so my clock may in fact be more similar to the typical male circadian rhythm.

I never wanted to be one of the guys, but….. here we are.

Regardless, I’m going to try it tomorrow. I’m going to see if I can do it, just once. Get my butt out of bed when my alarm actually goes off, get dressed for the gym, and get it done before it’s time for my 9:00 am office hours. Hopefully I’ll be more focused and productive after a sweet, solitary morning workout!

It’ll give me an excuse (as if I needed another one….lolol) to stop for a yummy Sheetz latte on the way home. 😉

 

 

 

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“past octobers” – a poem

waking up among the gilded leaves,

they shine like new honey against the sky.

i have wished for years

for a feeling i can’t reclaim –

that was lost from me one October when I was sixteen.

i breathe the scent of possibility,

and it fills my lungs with the need to move forward.

and yet I also need stillness,

i need a simple cup of coffee and conversation,

i need my heart to glow crimson with a feeling

of belonging.